11.28.2005

A bunch of little things
I have a bunch of random things that have been running through my head over the last couple of days. However, I'm feeling lazy, so instead of dragging each out into a really long post, I think I'll just highlight the big stuff.

1. I really like reading about everyone else's holidays. In some strange way it makes me feel good that my family is just as disfunctional.

2. I can feel myself changing and I think I like the way things are going. Possibly more on that later.

3. Rhode Island trip is this Friday/Saturday. I have a little inkling that things are going to get way out of control.

4. My mom is coming in 2 weeks and I can't wait. We are going to the Holiday Pops concert and shopping on Newbury Street.

5. I have to work on Christmas. I made it through Thanksgiving, but Christmas might be a different story.

11.24.2005

Gobble Gobble
Today was my first Thanksgiving on my own, without any family around. I thought I was going to be holding back the tears all day long, but today was turned out to be a delight. When I got out of bed this morning and looked out my window, I was greeted with 3 inches of freshly fallen snow. I then found When Harry Met Sally (my favorite movie) on AMC and watched the whole thing in my PJ's on the couch. After that I realized it was getting late and I had promised my roommates a Thanksgiving lunch by 2. My mom pointed out that I'm really the only one in my house that should care about Thanksgiving (seeing that I live with a Brazilian and a Canadian), but I forced them to take part in the American tradition anyway. I didn't have enough faith in my cooking skills to actually make a turkey, but I did make mama D's famous chicken (which turned out fabulous). To go along with the chicken I cooked up some mashed potatoes (yes, I mashed them myself), stuffing (thank you Stovetop), green beans, and a pumpkin cake. It was all quite tasty and 5 hours later, everyone is still alive. I would call it a success.

I also saw Rent this afternoon. It was really everything I thought it would be. Go see it. You will like it.

That about sums up my turkey day. I have two eleven hour work days ahead of me and then another day off. Here's to hoping that Saturday night gets here quickly.

11.21.2005

Dancing Queens
Things continue to be on the up and up. While Wednesday night at work proved to be a complete disaster, the rest of the week was just about splendid. Carrie and I decided to initiate a girl’s night out on Saturday to make up for the horrible work week. It ended up just being me, her, and her roommate, but it was definitely a wild and crazy kind of night. We took a taxi to Worchester and ended up at the Irish Times. It's a 3 story bar with a band on the bottom, just tables in the middle and then a club at the top. There was a good mix of people and the music played by the band wasn't too shabby either. Carrie and I ended up getting pretty wasted (or in her words, shmammered). There was lots of dancing involved and I'm pretty sure we kept our taxi driver very entertained on the ride home. Once we got back to Carrie's we found Mitch and the three of us decided we should put our Calm-P moves to use and busted out the protective measures we use at work. There were bite guards and restraints...it was great!

This is so cheesy, but it's so nice to actually have friends now...like real friends. I ended up crashing at Carrie's on her extra bed and this morning Mitch came over and made us breakfast because we were both pretty hung over. After Serendipity on TBS I came home and then headed back over to Fountainhead tonight and we had game night and watched Sunday night TV. While Team Carrie and Abby made a spectacular comeback, we ended up losing Cranium in the final round to a bunch of amateurs.

And now my thought for the day...
I made a countdown to my next vacation several weeks ago to help me make it through the next couple of months. Normally on Sundays I tear down the number to reveal the next number and how many weeks I have left. Today was the first day that I didn't even think about the countdown until just now...and that's only because it is sitting right in front of me. A few weeks ago I was considering not even taking classes next semester, but now I think that's crazy. I'm sticking with Simmons for now and then we will see what happens over the next months. Be my guest and interpret that how you wish, but all I can say is I'm in a very good place.

11.16.2005

I should really get paid more.
If you know me at all, you know how much I hate feet. Tonight at work I had to do something that I think I hate more than anything else I can imagine...I had to cut one of my students toe nails. I really almost gagged. I don't know what it is, but I can't stand feet and the thought of having to touch another person's toe nails makes me queasy. Not to mention the fact that the kids I work with don't exactly have perfectly manicured feet. eww, yuck.

On top of that, I had to deal with several behavior issues tonight and as a result I got the hell scratched out of my hand. I don't know why, but whenever this kid acts up, he always targets me and my right hand. It was just healing from the last episode and now I have a set of brand new scratches...thanks!

So the scratches, toe nails and a couple of other random punches to my forearms only meant one thing when the night was over...O'Leary's. Yeah, that's right...the crew gathered at O'Leary's and drank a little and vented about a not so spectacular day. I think I can now face another day.

11.11.2005

Yeah-Yeah (that's all one of my students says and it's really cute)
So perhaps I was throwing myself a bit of a pity party this past week. Life is good. I don't know what all of the worry was about. This could be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I mean this. My birthday was amazing. Even though I had to work until 9pm, there was still a large crowd that went out after to celebrate. Mama D sent me my presents, a cake and flowers. Plenty of friends called or left messages on the ever-so-popular facebook wall. All and all I felt the love and so to all of you who called, or left messages, or e-mailed...thanks!

I also feel like my life has taken a turn for the better in the last couple of days. For a while I didn't really feel like I had a sound group of friends here, but as the days go by, I feel like things are taking shape and I actually DO have friends. It's amazing what that does to a person's morale. We are making plans for 80's nights in Beantown and a weekend in Rhode Island and skiiing once it really snows. I think this winter may have many fun-filled adventures in store. So, no worries friends, things are on the up and up here in the Northeast!

11.09.2005

Another year
Tomorrow is my birthday and it's amazing how anti-climatic turning 23 can be. Is there any special perk about being 23? I've got nothing. It's almost 25, which is mid-twenties and who wants to be in their mid-twenties? I was going to recap the last year as a sort of farwell to 22, but now that I'm typing I'm really not in the mood. Maybe tomorrow when 22 is offically gone...

Stay tuned.

11.06.2005

So much to say.
So I haven't written in this thing since my vacation and there's a very good reason for that which part of my wants to share and the other part wants to keep it my little secret. But, I just got done reading the latest posts on PostSecret and I'm in a sharing kind of mood. So, here it goes...

I don't think I want to live in Boston for 3 years. I don't think I can do it. I absolutely hate being so far away from my family and friends. I loved my vacation and when it came time to come back here I had a very difficult time leaving. My brother is graduating high school this year and I feel like I've missed out on the last 4 years of his life. My grandma's cancer is in remission, but I feel like it could come back at any time and then what if I'm not around if she gets really sick? My grandpa just had a pacemaker put in and his health is failing rapidly. I'm not going to be able to go home for Thanksgiving or Christmas and my next vacation is 10 weeks away. I miss my family. I miss my friends. I miss Mizzou. I feel like I moved to the Northeast to prove something to myself and in these past couple of months I think I've accomplished what I set out here to do. I wanted to find a job on my own...without my mom's connections in Illinois. Given her position I could have had a nice job in several different school districts, but I didn't want that. I needed to go completely out of my comfort zone and find a job, a place to live, and live on my own without a nice monthly check from my parents or their basement to live in. That has all been done. I'm living on my own, making my own money, supporting myself. Now, all I want is the one thing that I was trying to get away from. So now, I left thinking, what's next?

Right now I'm 90% sure I'm going to finish out my 1 year contract and then head back to the Midwest. I'm currently in a grad program for Education, but I don't really even want to do that. I just chose it because it was convenient. I really want to do School Psychology and there are several good programs in Illinois. I'm currently applying for them and making the necessary connections, so that hopefully I can start school full time in the fall and be done with all of this in 3 years.

One last thing...I hate admitting all of this. For some reason I think it makes me look weak...like, why can't I just stick it out for 3 years? Along with that, (and if you know me at all, you know this is true) I hate talking about how I feel. I want to appear strong and independent, but right now, writing all of this makes me feel really weak and vulnerable. When people ask me how things are going I want to be able to tell them everything is peachy. Who wants to hear that I miss everyone like crazy and just really want to go home?

I guess that wasn't the last thing...
I don't want to end on such a horrible note and so let me say this. As hard as my job is, I really love it. The kids, even with all of their issues are wonderful and the people I work with are amazing. If this same job were within 8 hours of my house in Illinois I wouldn't be having these same feelings. Also, it's amazing what a night out will do for you. I went out last night with some people from work and we talked about some of what I mentioned above. While most of them are from New England, they still miss everyone at home. It's nice to know I'm not the only one feeling this way. And, I think getting completely wasted brought all of us closer together and many more fun nights are in store!